Recently, a best friend’s husband was diagnosed with metastatic cancer. After a couple of foggy days, she exclaimed, “How do I DO this?”

After careful contemplation, I felt the answer was truly in the question “How do I BE?” rather than “How do I DO?”

We run our lives doing, planning, and executing, but there is no roadmap for sudden or ensuing death. There are too many variables, and the hundreds of books on grief all hinge on someone else’s experience. It’s comforting to know we are not alone, there are threads of familiar stories and emotions, but ultimately-how we BE, is unique to each of us.

I remember after Brad died, I was in this state. I didn’t know how to BE. I carried on doing the robotic, automatic things I do in my day; the strong undercurrents of emotion were chaotic and unbalanced. Without an answer to the paradox of How do I BE? The only thing I could do was BE present.

My mantra became, “What’s happening in the next 5 minutes?”, “What’s happening tonight?”, “What’s happening tomorrow?”. Although I struggle every day, this new way of BEing is comforting.

When we know what to DO, carrying on is automatic, but when we don’t know how to BE, we can BE present in existence, in stillness, in silence, in being. It’s where we came from; it’s a safe place we can BE.

Practicing stillness means everything to me, and it’s a small thing I can do with great love. Teaching and holding space for my tribe to meditate is how I can continue to honour my purpose.

I can’t wait to see all your lovely faces and reconnect. Each day I will lead a gentle guided self-inquiry, intention setting and then a short silent meditation. You will also receive an audio recording to use on days that I am away traveling.

I am so grateful for you and the uBlossom community, together, we are stronger.